1.
CANADANo way, Norway
2.
RUSSIAWho let the bears out? Grr! Grr! Grr! Grr!
3.
SWEDENWeinhandl knows how to handle himself
4.
FINLANDFrom Sammy Davis Jr. to Sammy Hagar to Sami Lepisto
5.
CZECH REPUBLICBring back Reichel and Dopita
6.
UNITED STATESCompletely Finnish-ed
7.
SWITZERLANDWe need to start putting the puck in someone else’s net
8.
NORWAYGreatness is Top Eight-ness
9.
BELARUSWe’ll win gold when we hire Tiger Williams as an assistant
10.
LATVIAHonk if you love beavers
11.
GERMANYNext year, just ask: what would Hans Zach do?
12.
DENMARKCopenhagen does not believe in tears, it believes in beers
13.
SLOVAKIAAs a hockey general, Julius Supler ain’t Julius Caesar
14.
FRANCEIt’s better than the Plains of Abraham
15.
ITALYRemember the good old days of 1994 when we came sixth?
16.
SLOVENIAThis is a slow, painful Power Ranking